Why mums today are crazy – but amazing
You’re responsible for running your home and ensuring your children are healthy, happy and turn up to school every day. AND you work or run your own business. Here’s why one mum thinks we’re crazy – but amazing.
I think mums are amazing! Come on, you agree too, you probably just don’t say it out loud. Think about how much we have to do in a day. No one in their right mind would ever actually apply for a job that involved all of that effort and stress!
Mums constantly have a million things going round in their heads that they have to keep re-prioritising around everyone else’s needs.
We have the stress of looking after the well-being of our children and making sure we provide the right care, environment and education to allow them to grow up to be well-adjusted human beings.
Not to mention all the daily washing, dressing, playing, talking, singing, feeding, cleaning up after, reading stories, more playing, more talking, more cleaning up after… (yes, dads might help out but we still have to do it too).
When the little ones are old enough it’s usually mums who:
- Do the nursery and school runs, battling through traffic and badly parked cars.
- Deal with teachers.
- Keep on top of the admin.
- Remember to fill in the reading diary.
- Help with the homework.
- Remember to pack PE or swimming kit.
- Make school lunches.
- Send back permission slips.
- Make sure their uniform is presentable every day.
- Attend curriculum meetings, parents evenings, assemblies, plays and sports days.
- Help on trips.
- Deal with the tiredness and tantrums that get progressively worse as the term advances.
On top of all of that, lots of us still somehow find the time to work. Not that all the other ‘stuff’ we do isn’t work but somehow it gets labelled as ‘life’ so it’s different. Obviously there are lots of reasons for working – my point is that we still manage to find the time and energy to do it.
Some of us even go one step further and not only work but also take on second or third jobs and voluntary roles. We must be crazy!
I want to be me, not just someone’s mum
Why do we do it? Well, I can’t answer for everyone but in my case it’s so I can keep my brain challenged, learn new skills, meet different people and most importantly maintain a sense of identity and purpose.
I may be crazy to keep myself so busy but I know I’d be even crazier if I didn’t have all of these elements going on in my life. I want to be me, not just someone’s mum. I want to be a grown-up.
I guess I’m probably one of the maddest mums around as I work part-time three days a week, run my own pre/postnatal fitness business, run a mums e-magazine and have just taken on volunteering as the co-chair of a local nursery. Yes it’s lots of balls to juggle but I love it!
Looking after children is rewarding and is still my main focus but somehow for me that’s not enough, especially now they are getting a little older and are able to occupy themselves happily some of the time.
I hope my passion rubs off on my children
I even find they are interested in what I’m doing if they see me working so I involve them when it’s appropriate, ask for their opinions or get them to practice workout routines with me. It’s a great way to teach them some life skills and help them to understand what I’m doing and why. They can see I’m passionate about what I do and I hope that rubs off on them.
Some would argue that it must be detrimental to my children and family life to be so busy, which is fair comment. Maybe I am distracted by the constant list of things I have to do, or feel stressed when I have a deadline to meet.
I think I’m a good role model for my children
However, I prefer to think that I’m being a good role model for my children in this changing world, showing them that they can achieve anything they want by working hard and being organised.
My family benefits from me ensuring we have proper quality time together every day rather than taking time for granted and doing nothing special. I’m happier as a result of being independent, motivated and having a sense of achievement, which in turn, means they can be around a happy mum and feel happier too!
After all, isn’t the one thing we ultimately strive for the happiness of our family? In the crazy world of mums we believe we can do it all – I believe it too!
Debbie Lucas is the founder of The Mum E-mag.
Photo by Bruno Nascimento.