If you don’t make yourself attractive to potential employers, you won’t get hired. But what exactly are they looking for, and what do you need to do?
Mum of 13 Tania Sullivan founded and runs Larger Family Life – the UK’s biggest online resource for large families – with her husband Mike. They also run their own company, Sigma Media.
Tania reveals the mistakes many of us make in job interviews, and how we can learn to make ourselves more attractive to employers
I won’t hire you if you’re not attractive
As shocking as it may sound, if you don’t make yourself attractive to employers like me, we won’t hire you.
But before you assume (with appropriate outrage) that I’m suggesting you suck in your post-baby tummy and dig out a tight miniskirt, I need to make myself completely clear.
I’m not talking about physical attraction (although ensuring you’re smart and presentable is important), but your entire demeanour and approach – I’m talking about how attractive you make yourself as a person.
Why do some people get all the lucky breaks?
Have you ever wondered why some people seem to get all the breaks in life? Why opportunities continuously yet effortlessly seem to fall into their lucky laps?
You may be surprised to learn that it’s not luck at all, but the Law of Attraction. You’ve probably heard of the Law of Attraction before, or something similar – you reap what you sow, ask and you shall receive, visualise what you want and you’ll get it, etc. But do you really believe in it? And more importantly, are you using it?
Do you truly believe that positive thoughts result in positive results? That you really do have the power to be the person you want to be, and make your dream opportunities happen?
If you approach life with this perspective, then you stand a much better chance of getting what you want. You see, when it comes to employment, attraction isn’t about how you look – it’s about how you are. It’s about what you say, how you act and, above all, how much you believe in yourself.
How NOT to win over an interviewer
All too often in job interviews, people make excuses for why they haven’t been able to do x, y or z when asked. It wasn’t the right time, they didn’t have the right team, luck was against them… but these excuses are their way of justifying why they haven’t done what they say they really want to do.
And when asked about aspects of their new role that may be out of their comfort zone these people often respond:
- I don’t know how.
- I’m not sure I can.
- I’m worried I’ll fail.
- I’ve never done this before so I’m worried about getting it wrong.
- I’m not very good with new things.
- Maybe I’m not cut out for this.
How can you attract an employer if you’re full of self-doubt and excuses? If your approach to every disappointment in your past or challenge in your future is to give up and pass the blame onto things beyond your control – like bad luck and poor timing?
I would argue that if you really want to do something, you’ll find a way to make it happen. If you don’t, then maybe you don’t really want it badly enough.
Why should I hire you if you say you’re not good?
Positive, realistic enthusiasm is MUCH more attractive than passive resignation to an employer, and much more likely to get you hired.
My husband and I have built our business up from nothing and we want to continue to build it with a great team that we can rely on. Why should I hire you when you yourself are telling me that you are no good? If you don’t believe in yourself why on earth should I?
If you can’t convince me that you are the best person ever to trust a part of my business to, how do you expect me to hand responsibility for it over to you?
How to respond more positively
You might not know how to do something and you might not feel confident in something, but that doesn’t automatically mean you have to be negative or resigned to failure.
Take the negative interview responses I shared above and see how you can easily turn them around:
- I don’t know how it works but I’m a quick learner and keen to try new things.
- I am keen to take advantage of new opportunities and find out what I am capable of.
- I like to persevere until a task is done and get the best results I can.
- I am open to learning new skills and broadening my horizons.
- I know I can do this.
Use your attraction beyond the workplace
The law of attraction doesn’t stop at the workplace, either – you can apply it in every aspect of your life. But to invoke the power of attraction you need to find yourself attractive first.
Focus on your good points, the skills you have and what you can offer people. Are you a good listener? Do you make people feel good about themselves? Do you make a mean cuppa?
It’s all positive so focus on it! Don’t let the negativity in, make it all positive and make it all about you. Make yourself attractive. Make yourself the person that others need in their lives and opportunities will come.
Regardless of whether it’s in your professional or personal life, if you want others to know how great you are, you need to believe in yourself enough to tell them. You need to be attractive. From now.
Tania Sullivan is founder of Larger Family Life, the UK’s biggest online resource for larger families.Tania Sullivan