Mother, professional and wife – the different facets of ‘me’

Are you a mother, professional and wife? Discover how we all slip into different personalities for our different roles. 

As a mother, a wife and a professional, it sometimes feels difficult to be one person while filling all of these different roles. It’s almost feels as if I’m required to slip into a slightly different personality, change my attitudes or conceal certain emotions depending on the situation.

Sound crazy? It’s not at all. In fact, it’s a well-known sociological phenomenon that allows people to change roles and adapt to different situations as they arise. It’s called changing faces and it concerns itself with your sense of dignity in a social context. As a working mother, what different roles are we looking at?

Trethowans

The mother

This is the face I show to my children, and it’s one that can often change as they grow older. When they’re young, and it’s my aim to raise a kind and a respectable child, I adopt a loving and caring disposition, one that aims to nurture as well as teach.

But as they get older I might become sterner. This is important to demonstrate which boundaries can and can’t be crossed. This facet can be turned off and on at will, and will materialise when I’m at home with the kids, but also when I’m out and need to communicate with them on a maternal level.

The professional

While the kids are at school or at a friend’s house, that’s when it’s time to get work done, and that’s where this facet comes into play. This “me” is a lot more focused and measured, and I find that not only in my personality but in the way I dress too.

Gone are the sweatpants and loosely tied together buns. In the professional sphere of my life, I wear slacks, pencil skirts, my gorgeous Omega that really makes a statement, blouses and blazers. When meeting with clients and other professionals, I want them to know that I work seriously and hard.

The wife

This is the person I am to my significant other, and often my most vulnerable face. It’s one of the only times when I can let my defenses down and talk earnestly about my feelings.

And this isn’t just me being sentimental; I firmly believe that showing vulnerability on both sides of a marriage is important to the longevity of a relationship. Baring yourself emotionally gives the other party an opportunity to hurt you, and that means you’re trusting them not to.

Building on that trust is one of the core foundations of a strong partnership, and one in which love is fostered. It’s these values that I try to embody and foster when I spend time with my husband, as well as kindle a sense of romance.